Okay, So Maybe The Dude Grinding Maria Menounos Is the World’s Luckiest Bastard

We’re going to break a cardinal rule here on Egotastic!, a rule we loathe to break, but we really must this morning show you some ‘dude’ in order to explain how effin’ luck this said dude is.

In the past couple of days we’ve been exploring the plummeting depths of our jealousy of those folks who get to be extremely close and naughtily intimate with some of our most sextastic celebrities. Well, now include this Derek Hough character who took to the cameras on Extra yesterday to rub it in the world’s face just how he gets to rub his chub up against Maria Menounos these past few months and get paid for the privilege. Lucky bastard.

As you know, there is no reason for a straight man to ever dance other than a line of activities that directly leads to mating. This Derek dude has discovered a second reason and we’re jealous. Enjoy.

Here’s how we prefer to see our belusted Ave Maria, in a girl on girl sandwich with Nina Dobrev!

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