Katie Holmes Hotness Will Jingle Your Family Jewels

Oh, Katie, how your minders are going to freak out over this.

Katie Holmes went off the hotness charts for of all reasons, a jewelry company advertisements, showing more of her innate sextastic appeal than we’ve seen in quite some time, causing Tom Cruise to divert his submarine from beneath the Antarctic Ocean where he’s researching alien splash landings and return to home base to try and seal off his wife’s sexuality before it gets too far.

I don’t care what anybody else says about Katie Holmes (okay, I care a little), this woman has got the power of female allure still buried deep inside of her, past the point where Xenu can see, and, every now and then, we still get to see it shine, and it’s spectacular. Enjoy.

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