If you’re suffering through a serious Black Friday shopping nightmare today, then you understand our current stress level here. To be fair, we’re mostly just drinking spiked and spiced cider here in the office while our six-fingered trusty assistant Gretchen runs between Walmart, Best Buy, and Target, the trifecta of hell on this most prodigious purchasing day of the year. Still, it’s stressful receiving all her anxious texts. We’re empathetic creatures, even if thick-skinned deviants.
Tough boob-battle here on Friday. The inimitable young hot boobtastic Rosie Jones flashing her award-winning (I mean, we’ve given her many awards) funbags versus the veteran Page 3 glamous model, Sam Cooke, whose melons stand behind no other at the upright farmer’s market. Hmm. Using some basic Egotastic! mathematics, we know full well that the whole of the four flesh puppies is far more delightful than the merely the sum of the parts. So we’ll take all four! Enjoy.