With three weeks to go until her boyfriend gets sentenced for moving more oxy than my shady dentist, Dr. Gumms, Karissa Shannon did what any loyal gangsta moll would do -- she braided up like Bo Derek and did her own version of Ten on the beach in a skimpy pink bikini, flashing her sextastic body for a little preview for her next set of gentlemen suitors, of which I intend to be one. Sure, my only real credentials are that I'm not incarcerated (I mean, currently), but between that and my ribbon declaring me the 5th grade champion of Connect Four, I think I've got a decent shot over the other Hollywood actor and producer mopes who will descend upon her twin-hotness like moths to a sexy flame.
Stay strong, Karissa. And, you know, please unblock my number from your spam list. Enjoy.