It's over! Our long international nightmare is over.
Super sensational model Bar Refaeli has officially retired from her position as the world's hottest beard, leaving Leonardo DiCaprio with nothing but his courtside Lakers tickets and a bunch of other hot models ready to step into the sexuality-cover-up-role. According to our friends at Page Six, the two do intend to 'remain friends', which, coincidentally, is what they were before they broke up, so not much change there. Still, the big news here, I redouble my letter writing campaign to Bar, triple my transmission of amateur sonnet writing wherein I rhyme Refaeli with 'sexy smelly', and perhaps finally take those Hebrew classes down at the Learning Annex. This super hottie is up for grabs. Just check her out in this photo from the cover of next months GQ Germany and tell me she's not worth penning a few poems for. Enjoy.