Britney Spears Sex Tape for Free

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If you thought Britney Spears was stupid when she married Kevin Federline, or when she had two of his kids, or when she made a sex tape with him, you're going to love how Britney plans to stop K-Fed from profiting from the sale of the sex tape.

In a perfect example of cutting off your nose to spite your face, Britney Spears plans to give away her sex tape for free, just so Kevin won't make any money from it. Gratis. No money down. 100%, totally, completely, and utterly FREE! E Canada Now reports:

Sources close to Spears report she is "seriously thinking about" giving away a digitally re-mastered copy of the four-hour long sex video.

During a visit to Burger Basket with her two sons, Sean Preston and Jayen James spears said she may just post a clip of the video on MySpace.

"Brit figures she'll beat that sucker to the punch, just like she did by giving away pictures of Jayden James," said Spears family friend Nyla Price, 55, the owner of Nyla's Burger Basket.

"Half of nuthin' is nuthin', and that's what her lying skunk of a husband will get if she gives that video away before he can find some sleazeball to buy it."

Yes, just so K-fed won't make a penny, Britney Spears is planning to do the most drastic thing possible, which pretty much makes this the best story ever. Forget having to pay $29.99 for this DVD like you did for the Paris Hilton sex tape. And don't worry about getting fake versions on BitTorrent. If Britney has her way, you'll be spanking it to her and her white trash ex-husband, and it won't cost you a dime. It will, however, cost you your dignity.

But since you probably won't see Britney Spears naked, or having sex for a while, and because it probably won't be nice when you do, here's British super hottie, Keeley Hazell as a topless Britney Spears from the geniuses over at Zoo Magazine.